sly-card 

ok bear with me if you are not a sly-fan (maybe you would be converted to be one?) but ya thats the sly- flag. coming up is the sly-card (aka a postcard). As you wait for 01dec, admire this first. My sister's friend gave it to her and they have since found a place in my room. Kinda excited when I saw the flag and the card since you will never find me among those 13 to 15.5 giggling teens (ie girls) shouting and screaming for Sly. Oh and ya who is a? At least a knows that I am looking forward to erm a day, but then again maybe anyone who reads my blog would have known for now...  

Ok you can take the quiz about me (Jus Me) at this link http://www.quizyourfriends.com/yourquiz.php?quizname=041126205101-470902 Thought it was quite fun. Saw the first person who took my quiz. Surprised to see it cos the link had been there for a few days but no one had done it.

Erm but that someone who took the quiz is a. So who is a? And his/her email is a@mail.com. Anyway a scored 70 points, which either (1) who knows me well enough (2) who knows me and who reads my blog (3) who do not know me but reads my blog. And do you think a@mail.com is a real address? I dont think so but erm should I email a @
a@mail.com? Comment? And does a knows the correct answer after getting 3 questions wrong. But seeing had a score of 70 is (1) the quiz too easy? (2) the person knows me too well (3) the quiz is too easy and the person knows me too well? Erm!?!

Ok maybe lets play something (since I have alreadt finish exams and is in all the mood to play keke): What are your ultimate secrets? Not big earth- shaking secrets like bush-is-in-for-another-4-years (which is no longer a secret already anyway) but if you have read the book: Can you keep a secret? by Sophie kinsella then it would be
quite fun. Let me illustrate by telling you a few of Emma's secrets.
- she water her colleague's plant with orange juice when she finds her irritaing, which is everyday
- she fake her math grade (she scored C but wrote A)
- she doesnt know what NATO stands for, neither does she knows what it is about

Ok lets start with my secrets..
- i use the blanket everyday no matter how warm the night is
- i am too scared to go to bed with three pillows
- if i know i am heading for a scolding, i pretend to sleep
- sometimes i dont know why I got the grades I got because I think I am dumber than that. which is often.
- i never hug my puppy soft toy because it seems too small for my arms. and when it falls to the edge of my bed, i use my leg to kick it back to me. opps

Erm what else huh? Cannot think of any already. I think I blog too much of my life that I cant think of any tiny weary secrets that you might be super duper interested to know.

And its quite fun so go take the quiz. And thanks a. But ya who are you?

Yipee! Finish exams already! This means that my holiday has started!

Kinda nice when piggy ask me want to meet tomorrow, but sobsob because Im meeting my friends already, so would only be able to meet before 3pm. *Sorry* But then wed and thurs I am free, but our dear piggy is needed at lab sobsob.. Gonna find things to occupy my wed and thurs!!! Would like to cycle and make a trip down to Orchard aka
Far East! And my friday is off, since I had to go for the make- up investment thingy at ntu (thanks to the directions to ntu, courtesy of eric), and probably a dinner with our family cos my cousin is back from australia.

Anyway Eric is working for my dad this friday. Kinda nice to talk to him on the phone again. Hadnt really have chance for such 121 (ie one to one) talk. He is still super duper comical. I think because both of us are really blur, thats why in the conversation we shared, we always got stuff mixed up. For instance, he thought I said that I always meet Sly in nus when I was saying I always meet Aikai in nus when he said that Aikai is in Sly's camp also... keke... quite a fun times we had to pause and repeat again. Quite fun. Haha he said he gained weight and I didnt think it was noticeable. He said if its that noticeable, it would be rather bad already. Haha! Anyway would probably be meeting him and guys on sat to get present for yvonne. And he was saying how Ben gotten really drunk on his birthday. Woo! Big news. Thanks for the update.

Anyway today's paper is ok. At least I dont have someone by the next row who kept shaking her leg such that it irriates people. Agreed with Yapp as to why the person is not tired. Anyway exams is history so no more blog entry about studying, mugging and exams!

Gonna watch tv like crazy. Lots of shows that I taped it down. Wouldnt need to wake up early tomorrow. Meeting my friend at 3pm Queensway. Oh and really touched when the volunteer people called me to join their volunteer
ceremony on sat. But cos I would be joining them to buy present for yv, so I really dont know as to whether I can make it. But hey they remember ME!!!

Really tired. Maybe because of the inability to sleep well the past two days. Or because its the last paper already!!!!! My last paper today is at 5pm. Woo thats about 6hrs from now only. Really looking forward to the holidays already? Lots of stuff to do. My sister went to the library yesterday so I could jus take a book from her and start reading. I didnt watch the japan drama yesterday so I could jus play and watch it. Lots of stuff to do for the holidays!! Shall go back to the last bit of mugging and yaps...

You know, last nite, I went to bed at around 2am. But till 4am, I was still awake! Shucks. And I woke up at around ten plus this morning. Tried to take a nap after lunch (thought its the most probably time to feel sleepy) and I couldnt sleep. Dont know what my body is doing. But anyway I am studying so it isnt that bad. Halfway
through the lect notes already. Tomorrow's paper is at 5pm, last paper!!! Then, I would be coming home, watch TV, and erm sleep? haha. Anyway nothing much to share today aso, jus that ya they kinda predict Taifuk to win. Kinda surprising since Sly is always known to have a larger fan base. Maybe Sly fans aka Sly groupie can work harder? Keke wed's the show.

Jus now my sister wanted me to read her stuff about harry potter. Im truly a non Harry potter fan. I have no interest in reading the books (I know alot people is telling me to do so), in the movies and the related stuff (though I am alright with the harry potter poster in the house and my sister's harry potter craze. But kinda bad not to read her stuff when she kept wanting me to. She said that after my exams I wouldnt read her for sure, so she said since I couldnt sleep tonite I shall read it. So now finally I open the file and read seriously (rather than scan through, like
what I did the first time). I thought her command of language is excellent. But nevertheless, I am not really interested in the story plot. But at least I am seriously paying attention to what she wants me to do... good sign huh?
It reads 1:49am on the clock but dear me, I still couldnt sleep. Please jus knock me out?!?

List of things to do during the holidays
- watch Singapore Idol (yipee!)
- clear my wardrobe
- clear my notes
- think whether to do honors
- decide whether to do honors
- think of what modules to take
- decide on what modules to take
- buy/ zap textbooks
- shopping
- holidaying(?)
- cycle
- swim
- attachment at apb :(
- watch tv
- zZz
- blog
- make Xmas cards
- think of birthday presents (about 4 around the corner)
- work on the various finance related knowledge- the ntu investment club thingy
- ... anything I miss out now but i want/ need to do...

Please... let me fall asleep!

Pray that I will have a good nite sleep tonite. At least sufficient rest alright. Anyway was really feeling weak and what-so-ever that I didnt go for Ben's birthday eventually. kinda pity but never mind, will go to yvonne's next week.
Anyway watched Liu Xin Yu. Very nice. Between Mei Zhou and Xi Men, I love Xi Men's story the most. Have a hutch that it would be the one I like most out of the four. Wouldnt know until next saturday. But his story is simple yet realistic, romantic yet bitter- sweet. What Xiao Gen did was really touching. Most touching, I would say. And what Xiao You did was touching too. I dont know if I would like his story as much if Xi Men eventually ended up with Xiao Ge. But I guess its always the pity that makes you feel as though thats the one you like best and you really treasure it the most. I guess perhaps treasuring the present is as important as well. Because if you do, then your life wouldnt have another regret..But really, to me, thats touching.

Ok I have start reading my text, left with 4 chapters. But seems like an uphill progress. Anyway starting to do the online mcq as well. My friend was texting me about the finance stock picking and futures trading training course... Didnt go cos wanted to stay home to study. Anyway next friday is the make- up, thought it was quite fun, like what Fann Wong did in Pu Pu Wei Yin, if you remember that show. But scary aso. And Im gonna be alone on friday you see... Have to shout loudly in the pit to trade... scary scary! Cham and Im gonna be alone! Opps I mention that already!

yipeee... thats the quiz that i set for you... go try it keke.. stumbled upon this website while surfing through other people's blog. See, I'm supposed to be studying but here I am doing this... I guess its totally because (excuse excuse huh) I woke up at around 430am and couldnt go back to sleep. So i was in a not-so-nice mood. Then my breakfast was bad because I dont wanton noodle with red chillie sauce, you know those kind of chillie sauce... My mum told the wanton cook but she forgot! Shucks... Anyway feeling much better (of course, been spending the past hour blogging)... Shall get back to work some time soon... keke Meanwhile go take this quiz ya? http://www.quizyourfriends.com/yourquiz.php?quizname=041126205101-470902

Its friday already, the last friday in this year that you would find me still muggling. Jus showered but is feeling tired. Tired of studying. From yesterday till now, I jus finished with the 7 case studies. And its jus pure reading, I dont know if anything stays with my memory. Its not that important for an open book but at least I need to remember what are them so that I know where to look for them. Kinda scared of the 4 structured questions as I dont have any idea what topics would they be on. The sampled questions didnt seem that easy.

Anyway I was reading Jason Hahn's column in 8days. He's really funny. Like the way he writes. Maybe because I write that way too. Someday, someday I shall have a column of my own. Yaya when is the someday coming?!? Big question mark. I mean, how can I ever get a chance to try for it?

Kinda confused as to what to do tomorrow. I have (1) to study for my exam (2) the stock picking and futures trading at NTU (so far!) (3) Ben's birthday at East Coast Coastal Sands (so so far!). Shucks!!! Shall go back to look through the cases again. Then read through my lecture notes and then the text... Monday please come faster!

I have this compeling urge to once again write about Sly, that is as if I hadnt mention enough of him here already. But each time as I read in national newspaper and magazine of thirty over professional women declaring their (and their friends, relatives) affections for Sly, it justifies for another blog entry on Sly, to further indulge in this Sly- fashion as I am always better than them (ie never so crazy). And I dont think this wave of Sly- flu will end soon. Throw in another week or two. I mean who else is not waiting for 01Dec04 7:45pm? And do you think Im not in his camp?

You should go read this week's issue of 8days. This article- Rock steady, tells it all. The author Leong Pik Something, a 30 year old woman is crazy about Sly too. See its not me, you, us only and pardon us, we are not those giggling teens, we do not belong to the age category of 13 to 15.5. She captures the essence of this Sly- fashion/ flu to the very best. Hats off to her. She remembered everything Ken said of Sly, the 10 minutes encounter of her friend and Sly and ya all the feelings of a Sly groupie. She gave us all a name- Sly groupie. Now tell me, who else is an idol (ie your idol) if not for him? Like an overused statement, we all want a piece of Sly. From the Sly's wrist band to his the- silverly- umbrella/ Stef- Sun's- Shen- Qi- lookalike pants, even if it is jus that, it is enough for the Sly fans (ie top on
their shopping list). Opps I mean Sly groupie. So Slyly!!!

Guess what, its 2:36pm already and I hadnt start work. I barely sat down and flip open the textbook and to realise that I shall blog again. Argh!?! And how many times have I been blogging a day? Erm thats about two, three times a day. Wooo.

Anyway the name is out- Juan or San Miguel. I meant the golden couple Beckham's third son. I admit, Juan is a nice name isnt it? I thought it sounds real cool. As cool as Justin, Leslie (a new name that I like though I admit it sounds like a dog), Julian (quite cool also, not sissy at all), San (nice also rite? at least not so ordinary like Sam, though my sister said it sounds like Sand), Jan (not bad also as long as you dont name your next son Feb) keke..This list of names look impressive (as long as you dont name your son Beckham... so ergh). And if they are going to have a fourth
one, and if its gonna be a girl, IF, then maybe they can consider- Chocolat (rythems with Juliet, you know one Romeo and so you have to have one that sounds like Juliet), Rose (in Shakespears also) or Secrets (named after opps Victoria Secrets)... You know ehy? Because San Miguel is a Spanish beer. Ya so interesting right, named after a bridge, a Shakespears' character and a beer.

Oh did I mention that I forgot my eraser yesterday? And it was an Mcq exam that requires me to colour the bubble sheet. So I calmly (really I wasnt too terrified, jus shucks!) raise my hand and ask to borrow a eraser. Ya and my sister is like Woooo so you will always forget things one huh. I'm like - erm my first time okies... Anyway was watching Charlie Angels till quite late last nite. Alright movie. Jus that Im running out of TV to watch. Okok I should start studying for my last and ever last paper on monday right? Its IT1003, open book, but still have to study. Erm probably be tidying my wardrobe or something. At least start by reading the lecture notes. Then move on to the case studies and text chapters. The renovations are still going on so its really noisy at this time of the day. I wish they stop! Its irritating, but ya shall not complain since it wouldnt make them stop either. Maybe at least stop work for some half an hour so that I can take a nap in the afternoon? keke...

And details of next wed's Singapore Idol is out. We will know the results on the day itself, with each of them singing three songs, and the other finalists would be there! And this means that I will see David Yeo once again! keke still my very favourite. No matter who wins, I think I still think I have already made him (David) my winner. Dont know why I like him so much, but he gives people (or jus me?) this kind of sincerity, security and ease. So natural and so close to heart. And between Taifuk and Sly, its gonna a tough fight huh. I dont know but I guess Sly is closer to one's heart that Taifuk so if Sly wins, thats the major reason. And the year is about to end again. And sigh the last day of the year is my last day at apb. Is there a half day please?

Oh you know there is this song by MayDay also, titled Let Me Take Care of You. Argh hadnt heard it on the radio. Of course what, since I hadnt been listening to the radio for so long- T H E. But its the theme song for the Channel U 8-830pm show. Quite nice, but they always let us listen to a short snippet of it. And remembered Heng Xin De Heng Xin? Haha I wanted to listen to songs by MayDay so I searched through my computer and found this song. I remembered I really like it back then, and still do. It sings something like: You left me behind to think of you when you left. Everything changes and changes, but it couldnt be me.....Do they have some compilation CD or something, because I want to buy! Super duper like songs like Chun Zhen and all that.. brought back alot of memories...
Yipee finished my sociology paper already. Erm ben's birthday is next week so I have another birthday BBQ this saturday. Woo conservative three saturday of birthdays... Next saturdday is yvonne's... Ok but ben's confirm must go keke because he is always making people (eg big bird) drunk on their 21st, so we shall go to his! But then again, he doesnt have to worry, he can hold his alcohol excellently well. But its real far, its all the way at East Coast, yaya someone can jus walk there, but I had to take three hours of bus ride to and fro... Did that last time. Really dont like long bus rides. Heard the Singapore Idol's Thats What Friends are For on p10. Finally. Of course its Hey there its David Yeo, still my first ever Sing idol. Ok and sly. And I nearly forgot all about that jerry, if I hadnt heard his voice again. No books today! Tv, radio, sleep and :)

My paper today is at 5pm. Its at MPSH2. Kinda intimidating. I think I am still more comfortable taking exams in my own faculty, than at the exams hall. Seeing a sea of strangers all crowding outside the hall (still remembered when I was taking my ss, I saw piggy outside the hall...woo 2 semesters ago) make me nervous and lost. Nervous because I saw people whom I dont know all taking the exams as well. Lost because I probably would be standing at some corner alone. So now I am listening to Jue Jiang by MayDay, hopefully I am not too scared later. After that, after my paper, I will come back and watch TV (any tv will do, and I still have Charlie's Angels- hopefully my Tv is gonna be alright, please give me some colours, I am so dizzy and fizzy looking at the blue, yellow and their associated shades) and tidy my wardrobe and sleep. And can they stop doing their renovation work up there? Okok I am jus being fussy. Jus that the noise will make me more frustrated than necessary. And they gave a bad review for The edge of reason (Bridget Jones Diary II). But I think it should be quite nice, heartwarming to watch huh. At least I know my sis will disagree with Ong Shu Fen, that woman, so I am not alone at this. Shouldnt have read what she wrote, since she will only give good reviews and ratings to super duper big blockbuster movies. Anyway pray that I am not very scared later. And definitely look forward to the Phenomenal of Singapore Idol tomorrow since I didnt really notice Sly and Taifuk when the show started. Ya all I knew was David Yeo (ask Charles & Didier).. keke

Can someone tell me why Xmas this year happens to fall on a saturday? Argh! I was still hoping that Xmas will reduce my stint at apb to 19 days, but woo thanks, Xmas is on a saturday. Shucks. But the imagined Xmas is still white and snowy.

Anyway, had a slow start to the day. Was lazing around, not very motivated indeed. Then had lunch and watched MayDay. Like their songs eg Chun Zhen. Still remembered it was the theme song to a show on Channel U and that year was my 'A' levels. Every night, even if sometimes I dont watch the drama, I will switch on the tv at roughly five minutes to ten and wait for the theme song. And once I heard the song while in school and was telling all my friends about how much I like it. Think it was around my birthday and I was having my econs paper or something. Those days! And their new song Jue Jiang is nice. An upbeat, encouraging song that says something like: Dont ever give up on yourself even if others do. Didnt I always say that I shall be the last person to give up on myself. And I shall not give up because I dont like to see myself stopping halfway. So yaps that explains why I like the band, their songs and their lead Ah Xing. Way to go!

Anyway jus the talk about Ah Xing reminds me addias. Hey he's coming back. Hadnt seen him for one semester already. Though he doesnt know me, and I no longer recall his name, I recalled he's the first person I meet when I came to buz ad. And he's always remembered as ADDIAS. Why? Because of his black addias jacket. And also because I
always thought he looked like Ah Xing. And my sociology paper is tomorrow. I think by later today, I would start feeling the heat and frantically working harder than usual. But after tomorrow 5pm paper, I shall really give myself a good break. Erm maybe by watching more tv? And sleep more keke..

Anyway my neck is strained or is it a headache? Blame myself since I was trying to read my lecture notes (finally finished with it) by lying on the bed. But at least things get done. Xy messaged me asking me to Jia You, yap I will try, oil is precious keke.. Never mind, jus being lame there. Anyway 6 weeks is nice. Its on channel i and its kinda depressing. Adrian Pang & Steph Song acted in the show in which Adrian the loyal, hardworking husband who is not being appreciated by the company suddenly found out that he had six weeks left of live because of stomach cancer. And on the same day he found that his wife might not be pregnant with his child. Yap its really sad, but the conversation is quite hilarious, I mean with Adrian, thats what you get. And really like it. Guess will keep tuning in to it.

Sounds like a repetition of the everyday- mundane- life- of- studying- and- nothing- much- to- look- forward- to. Argh maybe Doc Tan might be online now? Need my consultation and medication!!! And ya I felt as though I am so isolated by the world except the existence of my TV will say otherwise. Thats why it seems as though there is one or another tv review every other day...And suddenly reminded myself of those times when I was so worried about my FM term paper and so I shall be contended with a simple and peaceful life- No threats, no potential ones either, TV is still working despite the only three colours that it has now is blue, yellow and different shades of blue and yellow (at least it is still working huh) and I can blog anytime I want to...

Woke up pretty late today. Jus wanted to sleep, though wanted to go jogging since I didnt do so on Sunday. Anyway each time I switched on my computer, the wallpaper is the photo of me & my 21st birthday cake. I used to always change wallpapers, but I guess I really like this one that I wouldnt be changing any time soon. And yv send her invitation for her birthday party on dec already. Anyway thinking back, since my birthday I hadnt wore that dress again. haha there is always time.

For sure I am someone with split personality.

Anyway read about what the author wrote in today's LIFE! ? So interesting. Its about how crazy they become as they support their idols, Sly. Haha same as me, they used to root for David Yeo but after his departure, its to Sly. But I dont think I ever get so crazy, to the extent of calling to support him. I guess I never done something like that- the passive side of me. Though definitely looking forward to 01dec. And Jay is coming for concert. But no point getting excited since I wouldnt be going. Going through my sociology notes, finishing soon. Then would proceed to lecture
notes... Ya nothing else either.. Didnt feel like doing anything else. Jus like to sleep, sleep and sleep, or watch tv, some more tv and more tv.. keke... but nopes-nopes.

Reading till this part where my sociology text reads... give in to or comply with ideals, but maintain regrets about society's superficial standards... Then suddenly recalled this article that I read in today's paper, about past sms stored in the phone. I dont really think that they are proof of anything. To me, they are memories of the past. I have some sms that I cant bear to delete, dated as far back to oct2001 or maybe earlier. I dont know if it applies to everyone, but these sms that you cant bear to delete might belong largely to people who had left your life to a great extent. At least for me. That explains also why I couldnt bear to change my first phone. I guess it is still one of the remaining artifacts of the past. And when I changed to my present (awful) phone, I am at least glad that the sms remained with me. Although segregated from the present inventories of sms, they are still part of me. I seldom will read them again, though there are times when they (the sms) could provide some comfort to me.

Nothing interesting to share. Jus trying to study and trying not to fall asleep at the same time. Amazing how the sleeping bug always manage to attack me when I am trying to study and keep myself awake. Anyway the only thing to look forward to is watching japan drama tonight, sounds so pathetic right?!?. Anyway aunt arrived in HK, my cousin is coming back soon, uncle in japan. Everyone is over the place but ya only I am still here...

Of course I saw Sly went in and I was overjoyed. Anyway slightly before SI, my uncle and aunt arrived, waiting for it to start. And the 9pm channel U show, Yi Xi Ren ended. At least to me, it was a very, very nice show. I really enjoyed watching it and I like the show. I guess I enjoyed watching Chen Hong Yu every night. Now that it ended, I felt as though some reliance of me on that show had gone. I start to get really scared about losing things/ people that I relied on, or that I am really dependent on. I dont know when or what trigger this fear recently. But I know this fear had always been with me since you died. Because all I could do was cry at nights. All the nights. And even if I dont cry, that is because I am forcing myself not to. I know this happened long ago. A year later did I only stop this night routinue of crying to my pillows. After that, for most of the time I was too busy to think about you. But there are always times when I wish you were there for me. I wish you saw the me now. I wish you were part of my growing up. I really wish you never leave me. I know you really love me, but I never ever had the chance to have you by my side again. I dont tell anyone, but I am telling you now that, I am really sorry. And you left, the fear has taken roots in my heart. Sometimes I forgot its existence, but it is coming back to me. I can feel it. As the show starts, my tears welled up in my eyes when I heard the theme song, which sang something like I forget to forget... Now I am crying. I am scared. But I know I am alone.

Its only one paper out of three that I have completed, but the next moment I was hanging around in Orchard. lright, but at least it wasnt planned. I only intend to stay behind to blog, to hang around with my friend, let my mind off buz policy and maybe go home, sleep (since I hadnt been sleeping very well for the whole week already. beats me! and last nite I only slept for 5hours) and watch some TV.

But anyway was walking to arts with sy for lunch. Then he said its warm and crowded and so we jus took the car, and ya as though its automatic, we were already in Orchard. Actually its nothing much, something we always will do, sometimes in between lessons even. But listening to the pop songs in his car is an enjoyable thing. Had lunch @ Hans, Far East. Had fish N chips! Yaps, its delicious. Go try it if you hadnt! And the decor is quite 'in' also. I know whenever he is there, he would be thinking about things that happened in the past, so I didnt talk much. The other time when he mentioned so, I didnt ask. I always believe that I would rather listen to the truth whenever you want to tell me, rather than listening to lies when you reply to my questions. I am not referring to any particular event. This is jus one of my philosophy for life. You can tell me whenever you want to, because you are sure that I would be there for you, but you can keep quiet because you know I would respect that too. I think someone told me that it is a very non- feminine characteristic. I dont know if so. Another common philosophy of mine is, as long as you are happy, nothing else is important (even if it means spending too much on something you like). And one last one to share with you, I always respect my friends. I try to accept them as whoever they are. I hope I am successful in sticking by to these philosophies that I believe in. Anyway the fish N chips is nice, so I jus concentrated on my food,
quietly. And ice cream @ Taka. Bel chocolate is nice but I think strawberry is better than Springdear's (though I cannot remember their new name now) @ Parkway Parade.

But anyway even before I reached home, in fact at the bus stop only, I was half wet. My bag's wet too. Keke mentioning about bag and I am reminded of the bag I saw @ Far East. 39.90bucks but it looks classically nice. Really. Ok even sy agreed. But we always happened to have similar taste (a good thing and a bad thing too.) haha we are an index portfolio with STI, it definitely has a small tracking error and yap my dear investor will be earning good dollars. Anyway, back to the bag, I didnt mean to spot it (quoting from him, this is supposedly the highest level for an addicted shopholic), but I jus walked by, and I heard the bag whispering softly in my ears, 'sh shh, come here, walk over here, see Im so nice right, you would like me, pick me up, ya, see you like me right, ya put me on you, stand in front of the mirror, see Im so nice on you, why dont you bring me home...' Ya so I did pick it up, I did put it
on me, I did stand in front of the mirror and admire. And I even ask for the price tag. Actually I know that 40bucks for a bag is expensive, at least it is not very cheap, and I know I wil buy it if I happened to be in the buying mode. But I really wasnt.

It was as though there is something at the back of my mind that is contributing to that tinkling of sadness in me. The sadness isnt obvious, especially in the sea of 'Orchard- and- Xmas- atmosphere'. I dont know if anyone notice that tiny weary bit of sadness, but at least I am aware of it myself. That sadness lingered around, though I really feel relieved after the exam, because I really have been studying that. Its as though the snake sheds its skin in the summer
(or isit winter, oppss I forgot), feel so much fresher, much relaxed. Especially with the rain. Though wet, I felt the air around me is fresher and has this crystal-green smell (ok try to imagine that).

I dont know but I know something somewhere isit really right. I mean normally after such a intense period of studying, dropping by Orchard would spur me on this little shopping spree. Though I saw a nice presentation dress @ Far East (which is not too expensive also), though I saw the bag, I wasnt really in an urge to own it. I am not saying that if I dont buy things that I like there must be something wrong with me, but I jus feel that there is something wrong with me. Or maybe I am even wrong on this. But anyhow even if there is something wrong, I am not interested to know. Not curious to know. Why tried to uncover a potential bomb or problem when things are alright the way they are? Jus be me. Or perhaps Im thinking too much. Maybe its jus because I would be going Bangkok so Im trying to save till then... so jus go watch Charlie's Angels & Bridget Jones Diary that I taped, then wait for dinner and Sly. Pray that Sly is in, because he is my shining star in my life ie he's the shining star if Im an undecorated christmas tree.

Jus completed my first paper, woo finally. Been studying this for the past few days. Plus fingers on my right hand are aching like crazy. As though it had been another 'A' level economics paper. Hadnt had such feelings for a long time already, since those college days when we would write and write and write like crazy. The term that we would use to coin this in the past is: diarhorrea. Looking at the computer screen on my right, it says... peril of the... then I couldnt read what it says. Alright I have this tendency to see at other person's computer screen right, bet you would say something like that. Anyway its my friend working on his sociology research about economy and society.

Looking forward to tonite's SI though Im really praying for Sly to stay on. I mean if Sly is gone, argh another of my idol is gone, then what is the point of knowing who SI is. I mean no way am I accepting a non representative woman to be our SI. She can be her idol at her home for all she wants, and ya I never met anyone who is in her camp, so really tell me whose idol is she. Yaya Im not her fan obviously, not her air cond, nothing. But the malay guy is really good last nite, I must say. Opps still dont remember how to spell his name anyway. But he looks really sad, and as though will collapse and break down in tears if the camera is to focus on him for one more moment. I love it when he sang song #2. But ya I really want to see Sly again. Sly and him again on first dec, when my examination are over, and I wouldnt have to keep running out and in of the living room as they sang. Want to see Sly as he performs songs that are so-sly. :)

Then I can watch tv, live some life of a perfect human. Keep having buz policy in my mind and conversation. Lingering image in my mind...

Even though I have been studying Buz policy for a few days, tomorrow being the examination still makes me really stressed now. Though the computer is on, probably be listening to class95. Think the classical/ country/ old songs really de-stress me at this moment.

Last nite, I was listening to 95 that I couldnt fall asleep. Anyway the new host is way too loud for the quiet nite, though her songs are really beautiful too eg like Christopher Cross. So today I was kinda tired when I woke up. And you know at this time of the day my room gets really warm.Anyway I guess though I was thinking it would be good if I could record tonite's SI, I probably going to watch it and go to bed immediately after that. I mean they are singing three songs from the movie and I am really looking forward to Sly's. Not feeling very good, feeling weak indeed. Its the once-a-month-woman's-affair (not shopping alright). Haha to say about shopping, today's papers feature 3 women who supposedly shop a lot. They should have asked me for recommendations. Man shop as much, if not more! I would sure recommend sy. haha

Woke up but felt as though my eyes are so tired. Anyway studying buz policy and going to watch tv and have lunch later keke. And you know what, The Champion isnt finished yet. The very last bit is on TV tonight. Yippee, another thing to look forward to! :)

Ok can you message and dry your hair at the same time? I cant! At least I know it today. Because I was trying to blow my hair and sms, and ya I gave up. Okok laugh if you want to, but tomorrow when you blow your hair, try to sms me also. If you can, erm ok then maybe Im lousy, if not, haha yaps we cant sms and dry our hair at the same time. Anyway back from school already.

And I was bored in school such that I created this email account by the name tanjustina2001@yahoo.com.sg. But dont bother sending anything there, because its out of boredom that I did that. I dont know if I ever go there and check. Plus my email always is siying2001@hotmail.com (which is created when I was 18/19). Ok now lets
explain why the name justina. haha because from around 17 years ago (which is definitely not too long ago) I like this christian name. I think my sister said eeeee to Justina and my friend sy had similar comments. Though I like the name, I dont really think my character suits that of Justina, though I really cant put into words whats the character of Justina. But maybe it suits? You think nice? haha. Ok I used to really think about alot of such stuff. When I was 15, Venice is the country I know I always wanted to go. St Marks! Ya and I remembered when I was 18/19, one of my friend said he never heard of Venice before (shall not say his dear name haha) when we were talking about it. Ya, some old memories huh. Nice memories. Two more days to the first paper...

Couldnt sleep last nite. Shucks. Had been a few nights already. Something happened in the morning and now I am left unhappy. Seemed like my mood isnt getting better.

Already in school now. Guess studying at home for too many days in a row is bad, need a change in environment. Though I really dont like the library being so cold. Anyway, guess there is nothing much to talk about besides studying, studying and studying. Jus looking forward to going home tonight to watch TV.

And really like the sunday jap drama. I know they dont really buy really good jap shows now but its something that i love to watch since primary school. Korean shows are nice, but they are often more soapy, and lack variety. Anyway this sunday show is called: Searching for the polestar. The actors arent that good looking but going only three weeks of it, I already love it. Guess its the plot that attracts me. It talks about a group of 7-8 good uni friends and their lives three years after they graduate. They all met up with difficulties especially in the working world but they supported one and another. Ok going off now

Every public holiday on a monday seems like a sunday. Especially today since I dragged myself up at quarter past six and went jogging, something I will normally do on a sunday morning. Anyway the jog was alright, was listening to class95 and at one time when I tuned to 933, I heard this FIR song about Flying away or something. At least something encouraging. Then it reminds me of this chinese poem that I wrote long ago while I was jogging (eg wrote it on my mind till I reached home and put it down on paper). It says something like because I dont like to see myself failing, so I shall persist. Something of that sort. And while on my way back, this chameleon slid past me and luckily I was so deep in my thoughts that I didnt scream. I only noticed it when it slid past me. Luckily it didnt mistaken me as a tree or something. And at least it is smaller than the one I saw in school.

Anyway was searching for this story which sees me writing an email to the clouds, but erm I cant remember where did I save it. Maybe in a CD but never mind. Shall go into my sister's room to find that piece of CD. And haha ya it was me who placed that teddy bear on my sister's face, once again :) Going to sleep, waking up later to watch TV.

Realise that I have a collection of Xmas songs from last year. And ya the spirit of the december Xmas seems to be all around the air (at least in town) but seemed to be frozen till after my examinations. So I guess a lot of times, it has nothing to do whether there is a Xmas tree at home (though I really wish for one jus like that of Justin's) to decide on the mood. Anyway ya I am listening to the one by Britney now. Think its Wish for Christmas or something. I guess the notion of Xmas was that of the Home Alone series. Oh the other day I heard a song 'Forever for you', dont know who the singer is, but the song is really nice.

Something to read: Rain & shine on the soul

The ageing of the soul, like the physical ageing, surrounds us. Yet often we attached our unwillingness of acknowledgement to it, as though it will prolong our progress toward such a state. The soul aged when it loses its drive, passion and its ability to find meaning in life. The slower drive to life can sometimes be seen from how we (at least for me) ignore the existence of the clock and continue to hug the bolster and lie aimlessly on the bed. The passion of life dries up like the potted wintering Pandan leaves. Not as though the meaning in life evaporates under the strong rays, it is just that, like what the title says, a huge portion of our life taken up by highly routine work, much
not to our choice. It can also be due to prolong exhausted of the soul, such that it finds itself losing interest in things in life. Yet, not as pessimistically, it is a highly reversible cycle. Just like the un-anticipatable business cycle. Anything from a new haircut to a new dress purchase could bring about a lively soul, but on the reverse, anything like a bad haircut to an unworthy dress purchase could too bring about a depressed soul. Mood swings is the market force in this economy and so there is not much reason or justification sometimes.

The physical ageing is more apparent to the eyes: seeing the old body walks slower than before, needing more sleep than before, having more time than before, having less standing in society than before, having harder hearing than before, less lively and active as before, more recollection of the past than when one’s younger. If it jeopardizes your own comfort to imagine yourself growing old, then learn to see the physical ageing in your dog. As the editor of LIFE! always writes about signs of her ageing dog, her decision to put it to sleep to her conflicts of buying a new dog to
replace the old, it seems like there is no light at the end of the tunnel.

So my clock is ticking at 21 already.

Didnt wake up to jog today because i couldnt sleep last nite and by 3am I am still wide awake. I wonder if its the radio. Sometimes I will fall asleep while listening to class95. The music at nite are sentimental classical love songs, so romantic and smooth. Sometimes it puts me to sleep, sometimes it keeps me awake. And i dont know which times will happen each time. Though I dont really like Simon, his leaving still makes me feel that its a pity. I guess the concept of "leaving" is still difficult for me to comprehense.

Anyway was telling sy that I really hadnt make up my mind whether to do honors or not. Although I will try to upgrade my lousy skills on all sort of stuff, it doesnt mean I am doing it. And even if I think I am not ready to work it will not justify to do honors jus because of that. As well, even if my CAP is great, it doesnt mean I am doing it for that reason as well. He said i sort of think through stuff, but i guess i was jus losing passion. Dont know why, but i felt that i wasnt driven by passion. As though many of times i am doing it jus because there wasnt any other thing i
wanted to do.

Had a great lunch today. Lotong! Really nice. My grandma's neighbour cooked it. Anyway grandma is going to have an operation so hope everything is fine. Sometimes I feel that I have so much words to say but I am lost in this world.
And if you read today's paper, that again proves that the techno runs in our blood. The world of wireless. Going to bath, then study my buz policy.

Something fun for you to think about: How many beige washing machines were sold in Canada last year? (really go think about it and i will let you know the answer if you want)

Something fun for you to make & eat: Boil spaghettis/ macro till edible, add into a pot of Mushroom soup and eat

Something fun for you to read: the two stories that follows

Pieces of my world/ Part I: Your world is at the other end of the globe
Scrutinizing my relatively orderly life, I try to remember things that would upset it.

Just a moment ago, my computer hangs on me, and that to me, is one big upset. I mean, with no expectations that any electronic application would work against you in this worldly environment of tech gadgets (so much so that all the newspapers highlight are the latest, most sophisticated and often expensive technological tools that we can lead our lives without), the computer hanging seems like an upheaval. Just like when the island is inflicted with a power shortage (who could find their candles in time). Or the times when your ringing machine is down and you felt as though you are in ice-land (either the public phones seemed to stop running all at the same time or you don’t seem to get hold of one ten-cent coin or a phone card is nonexistent in your world). Welcome to the world when every sense of logical, orderly technological cells runs in your blood.

Eight minutes before the presentation, we were still in the computer lab, trying to beautify the slides, which would soon lose their values minutes later. Do things come fast and go by this fast too?

When was the last time you checked your mail box? See your first reaction must have been that @hotmail.com or @yahoo.com email account, but no, I mean your postal- snail- mail- box. See, you belong to the world of electronic exchange. Your membership registration is free (in fact unconscious to your knowledge), is by law and for life. (Remember how you felt the last time when you couldn’t access to your mailbox?)

Yet, on the other side of the globe, someone else has never had such problems. They too are occupied with their sets of upheaval. Those sets of upheaval seems to take up only that small part of our days- when we read the newspapers (when you bother to read beyond LIFE!), when we watch or hear the news (not some drama shows that you are addicted to). Alright, maybe it is bigger if you intend to visit that country during the holidays would you bother more about its happenings.

Their turmoil seem so far away from us even though I bet you heard numerous times that the planes make the world seem so close to each other. I guess it is only true for those who could afford it.

Their mayhems are beyond our comprehensive. And my tutor mentioned that wisdom is when we can see beyond the obvious. So are their mayhems the obvious? What is the obvious to you, is not obvious to me.
Their problems could be life threatening could make them so helpless, could deprive them of a life of yours. But all we could hardly remember was: our examinations ahead of us; the shopping spree for the December holidays; the next public holiday; the next mobile sales…

Of course, not all the time, not always.

Part II: Sweet to the tooth
Traces of sweets could be found in my bedroom. On the shelves is a bottle of sweets that I wouldn’t take more than one in a single day. It was a 21st birthday gift from my friend. Each time I eat it, it reminds me of her too.

On my temporarily- set- up- table- meant- to- cope- with- the- exams (so that I can have one more place to study) are mentors, hacks, the rabbit brand sweets. They used to scattered all over the sofa but have since piled on my table for easy reach.

Contrary to your assumptions, I don’t really love sweets, or on normal days (i.e. when there are no examinations, mentors are more than enough for occasional indulge). They are just one of the many phenomenon or signs of examination coming.

Others could be: notes are piled in stacks, more precisely the number of stacks tally with the number of modules I take; never running out of highlighters and pens; calculator is handy; hair bands are in great use; try to include more fruits as diet; coffee is the miracle-like drink that keeps you awake through the day; meal times are more than welcomed (because you can stop studying, indulge in TV without feeling guilty); the alarm clock is more important than the radio; the bedroom door is often closed so that even stretching your ears doesn’t help much in the latest drama developments; you can contribute any/ all laziness around in the house to examinations; you have a list of Must-Dos (Mine include: sleep, blog, shop, sports, attachment, learn everything from excel spreadsheets to regression, to DataStream, to Bloomberg, so that I can enrich and be a Finance undergraduate that I can be proud of- even if I am not doing honors. If I am doing it, then I guess it is a necessity more than an enrichment) after the examinations; you start to plan your shopping adventures with your friends; you suddenly realized you hadn’t been in town for quite some time; you wish you were still doing projects (at least for me); any sleep is better than no sleep; afternoon nap is so tempting yet guilty; sleeping becomes the most favourite hobby while the bed is my best companion; hugging a book and fall asleep is more justified than sleeping without any in hand; the blog is about studying how many chapters of which textbook and how boring life can be before signing off to go back to studying again; the end of the semester terminal symptoms are getting more overwhelming; the body tires more easily than during the holidays, and you get this question right in the face: How many beige washing machines were sold in Canada last year?

Was in school for a review lecture just now. And was waiting for my dad while I heard this person on the phone. Hey its not that I am busybody but then he was loud so I had to hear it right. I bet any other soul near him would have heard what he said. Anyway he said his tv blew up, probably because of a short circuit, and his house in engulfed in smoke. So I was sitting there trying to imagine that. Oh and another detail- his 48 inch tv or something... Haha... and guess what, when i reached home (it was raining cats & dogs) and saw this old lady still out strolling with her dog. Of course she has an umbrella, but not that dog. Dont know it was whose idea to go strolling on a raining day. Haha.. Anyway going to tiger air website to check air ticket fares now...

And I wonder if i was invisible today? Never mind. I heard the movie review for FORGOTTEN, sounds erm interesting, but ya things sound interesting more often when it is not yours... Winners' curse? keke

As though I am trying to isolate myself from people... Anyway, woke up at almost eleven in the morning, read the papers, pack my stuff and went to school. Upon reaching school, sat at this little corner of the canteen and dine alone. What a lonely, boring life of mine. More loneliness as i went to computer lab to work on sociology mcqs. I am not lonely because of studying alone for exams etc. But i jus dont know how to describe this sense of loneliness. The kind of loneliness that make me feel like watching tv but when i do, i still dont feel good... Dont know if you ever feel like this before.

And hey guys out there, start plannings for the holidays? Officially I would only have 2 weeks of holiday. (See my expression and you know that kind of disappointment) Because I gotten the attachment at the tiger beer company. So from 6dec to 31dec, I would be "what time is it? Tiger Time"... ok lame! Anyway i hope they have internet in the office (sometimes they only have intranets) so that i can (1) blog (2) read your blogs (3) check my mails two million times in a day (4) log on to msn (5) check my grades (6) surf the web to see what modules to take next semester ... So wish me luck.

haha ok after checking my mailbox, saw this email regarding the presentation we did two weeks ago. The tutor gave us a grade, then mention points as to what we have done well, and what we can improve. Find that the pointers to improve is rather interesting so ya sharing it with you here..." A number of minor stylistic concerns. Number your pages. Staple your report. Make the font internally consistent." Ok as for the minor stylistic concerns, i dont really get what she meant. As to the page numberings, admit it, its my fault. Because of the lack of space (we always have
too much words!), i removed the page numberings, did the contents page and promised to write the numberings back, but ya i was too nervous when i was in class to remember it. As for the fonts, my fault also, since I was the one who compiled the report. But she is really nice and didnt deduct marks for that!! Something jus to laugh about. And ya yapp finishing exams soon ya! Congrats! :) nites

Was watching jay on tv, so interesting. Nothing else. Been in between of studying, yawning and sleeping. But its a rainy day huh. Have lessons tomorrow and on saturday. So really nothing else to talk about. Jus that there are going to be more tv at nite.. Boring...

Something to share that might spread the little bit of joyfulness to you. Was in the computer lab this morning before our class, and after we were done with the slides, i print it and my friend went to collect the slides. The number of slides we had is 99, and we wanted to print 6 slides per page, but the super blur me went to print SLIDES, so my friend ended up paying $5 worth of high quality rough paper. Was so shocked when he came back and asked me to print again because i printed each slide on one page. And i went over the printer, finding a stack of paper that belong to us. Sorry to my friend and erm something that we were laughing over this afternoon...And in our presentation class today, the group after us worked on the same two countries as well. Such a coincident. Even some of the industries they choose were the same as us, though companies arent the same.

Came back from straight away after the last presentation ended. Had this really tired feeling inside me. Dont know why especially when I had enough sleep last nite. Bad habit huh. Nothing much to look forward to. Jus that still have to go back for sociology lecture tomorrow, otherwise I would have a two-and-a-half-day long "holiday". Exams starting next friday..19/11 Buz Policy 24/11 Sociology Making Sense 29/11 IT1003

Dont know should I go to bed already, or carry on reading my sociology notes till I finish them? Anyway the feverish feeling is back. No choice but keep popping VitC and drinking water. Last presentation tomorrow. Suddenly with everything ending again... maybe that feeling of lost is back once again...

When i was on my way home, I had this indescribable tiredness. Not the kind when the body needs a sleep. Its the deepest down kind of tiredness. Dont know if you will understand such a feeling, but anyhow I decided that maybe because there is this one thing that is unresolved so its weighing me down. As I hear you saying, the semester is coming to an end, and I realised I have been carrying it with me, that invisible knot, for a whole semester. So its time, i guess being the only solution, is to forget about it. I dont know if I can still see you on the twenty, but ya....

Anyway something light... Ocean 12 is coming soon! Remembered that when I watched Ocean 11, it was in my college times. Haha wonder if I could get those friends to go watch it together again. As the thriller said, Twelve is the new Eleven... My life will carry on...

Had been drinking water the whole day because had this feverish feeling. And the headache made me so sleepy that i was lying on my bed half the day. Woke up and about to read my Buz policy lect notes when my friend called. So was talking till dinner time. Then had dinner, watch tv (not again?!?) and was on the phone again. So tempted to buy the Von Dutch t-shirt leh. Should i? Actually the t-shirt is very simple, jus a plain design (many colours to choose from!) and the brand name Von Dutch on it. Actually saw people from law wearing a few weeks ago. Saw the bag even. Was very tempted to get it though didnt. Then my friend said wanted to buy so haha.. should i or shouldnt i?? But its not as if its a pressing question, because besides the little feverish feeling i still have, i am very happy with all the things i own. After the saga i guess, i treasure the simply lifestyle and the things i own. Now i know the feeling of losing the things that I own, so I arent complaining. So whether if I would eventually get that tshirt, I want to say, I am still happy.

And to the many out there who is in the midst of examinations or studying period, hang on there. Meanwhile try to be happy as well, because it is one stage of your life that you can afford to do so. The life of a student will be over before you know, so enjoy and treasure it before its over.. Anyway jus here to send my project work stuff to my email so that i can work on them in school tomorrow.

Woke up and jog and then went back to sleep again. Feeling restless the whole day. Why!?! Anyway just finish reading the articles and questions for home assignment, and coming online to find what's the market expectation of pounds in the near future for my project. Going to devote most of today completing my home assignment and my
project. If there is still some time/ mood left, then i shall move on to reading my sociology lecture notes. Tuesday sees my last presentation of this semester, have this nostalgic feeling, out of no where, haha. But today's really warm isnt it? And its weird that its not raining today since its been so wet and rainy the whole week.

Been doing much studying today, finally. Studying my IT. Nothing much planned. Initially irvin said there's dinner to celebrate pei thung's birthday but was cancelled subsequently... so ya its those studying. Nothing on tv till Summer Scent as well. But guess I probably wouldnt stay up to watch, want to jog tomorrow, so probably sleeping in early. And stop thinking about that ok, sy. Haha! Crazy fellow...

And hey, like what stef sang in her new song, stop searching, this is the best time of your life. Something from my recent story titled Giordano Jeans.

What is the life of a student? It is: talking about the new Giordano jeans in the middle of listening to Business Policy class; it is visiting the toilets together during breaks, buying drinks and sitting down at the canteen and talked before going back to class, it is getting scared about being penalized for plagiarism, it is thinking about the anti-plagiarism
software and leading to think about inventing an anti-lazy software for bosses to monitor their workers, it is thinking about how all these would change when we graduate, it is walking to Arts canteen whenever we are in the mood, it is taking lunches at weird hours and weird (super long) lengths, its listening to music (way too loud) in the computer lab, it is surfing website seeing Stephanie and her new mtv, it is about flipping through Business Times finding the Yen and Euro exchange rates, it is wanting to win our “arch rival”, it is disliking everyone else in that team consisting our “arch rival”, it is observing what others wear, it is talking about shopping, it is talking about attachment, it is talking about wanting to go on holidays overseas, it is about working together to win our “arch
rival” and that sense of accomplishment when we really did so, it is using the same PowerPoint template slides the second time when we would be presenting in front of our “arch rival” so that he would lose to us on both
occasional on that same template (though the first time was in baby blue and the second time baby pink), it is creating slides using baby pink and lavender- purple that makes the whole thing so girlish, it is creating an hypothetical client for our portfolio and called him Mr Andrews Sand (my suggestion!), it is watching each episode of The Champion and discussing their acting skills and fashion, it is going shopping on a weekday, it is playing badminton in the afternoon of a Monday, it is concluding that we are introverted extroverts, it is having an email account of NUS…

Slept real early last nite, at about ten. Finally had a good nite sleep, waking up at 7pm. Today's focus is studying. Been watching erm too much tv for the past week (almost 3 hours each day). But with the saga over, life
gets on. Finally life becoming more normal.

Guess what i did in school yesterday? Was in school around 1130am. Then was at law library doing the powerpoint slides for the last project presentation for this semester. Was about 1230pm when sy called. Said he had no lessons
and is in computer lab. Ask me to go over. So went over there to continue working on it. Was about 1 plus when we went to arts to eat. Saw alan anyway. Was there talking, eating and relaxing. Been a long while since we had the time/ mood to do it. Then sat outside law library for a while, before heading to his car to get 8days. He's so funny, saying that its bad to let others know he's reading 8days especially when he wasnt that keen on it (his sister bought it). Haha but jus like me, sly is our favourite! My last 2 hopefuls have to be taofi (i know i dont know how to spell his name) and sly! Way to go... Oh saw kai when i was going home. Real late already and he's still around, doing project i guess.

But as i am saying the usual things we did as students, it might jus be over soon. The life of a student. I guess it not only ends when your life as a student ends, it ends too when your friends' end before yours. We were having the 15mins break during buz policy and sat at the canteen to have a drink. Life isnt gonna be like that in the future. When you are out there working (= slogging), you arent going to sit down with your best of friends to chat like this. And all day you are going to face your colleagues huh. What a dull picture to paint. Haha and who could talk about giordano jeans in the middle of the buz policy class? Only when you are a student, i guess. And who could get so scared about plagiarism except us? And who thinks only about inventing some anti-lazy software so as to monitor your lazy workers? Us!

Seeing the stuff left by the terminal next to me, i guess it must be a guy. Because firstly its so messy, and all the belongings look like they belong to a guy, except the rather- nice- handwriting- from- afar and the numerous highlighter by the computer... so lets wait and see if i am right.

Anyway the latest saga is over in my life, really relieved and glad and grateful.

Hey so as you await for yapp's review -- do it only at the expense of your toilet breaks ya since you are having exams now right :)-- lets guess this song... guess the title and singer!

Time/ have been passing time watching train go by/ all of my life/ lying on the sand/ watching seabirds fly/ wishing there would be someone waiting home for me.....

Anyway sly is cool isnt he? Love especially the I swear... And still hadnt finish with my IFM report write- up.... Arr

Even though dec holidays isnt here yet, the rain that used to belong to dec is already here, and here everyday. Oh saw sern long in the canteen today. Anyway in school now and as usually cold because of the rain. Going to do the last project stuff... my mood: nah, not good...

Jus woke up. Was watching Kill Bill last night till almost 1pm. So violent show. Jus happened to know of this show somewhere and thought i would borrow it during the holidays but my sister went to borrow for me.. Anyway the Fm test yesterday was quite a disappointment. Because i was so scared that i dont know how to calculate yet my mistakes are unforgivable... Dislike it when i let myself down in such a way.
Anyway probably going for the lecture tomorrow so that i could laze abit
around in the house. Would be more relaxed for now at least, but continuing
to read my text and do my revision...

Think doc tan is being driven crazy because of me and my chrisitian names. Not only yapp, but my school friends are also thinking about christian names so that its easlier for others to remember you. What a thing right. Anyway as i was saying, i like the letters s, j, a, t, i, k... ya in that order, and I want one chrisitian name that suits my character. You know that these names mean something, so i wouldnt want one that seems so out of the way. Eg i thought sharon is a nice name, though i admit its too common. But at least its kinda my character you see... Ok i admit i like this name- justina but it doesnt suit me, so what say you?

Think im crazy already.. thats explain the current msn nick * si * beyond rationality... anyway surfing smurf website so erm better go to bed soon ya :)

Going to bed after this... had been studying for my FM quiz for almost the whole day, though the afternoon nap is too tempting. Haha so after tomorrow, I can watch the vcd i rented, can do some sports, catch up on sleep and tv... so looking forward to tomorrow, and hope that the test will turn out great..

Feelings/ is your created dependent on your self constructed image/your weakest link/that draw you beyond rationality/is sunny upon your image/is rainy in its absence

Feeling weary early monday morning, what a unpleasant feeling. Anyway nothing much since its FM quiz tomorrow. Already have plans as to what to do after that. Gotta give myself a short break that would consist of: Listening to yan zi's album carefully, watch the rented video that would be due on thursday, some shopping would be great (window shop that is), tv, tv, tv and some sleep.

And oh ya I was trying to blog last time in vain. Anyway I was doing a bit of my IFM project last night, and realize that those strings of calculations done by my mates, I don’t really understand. I guess that’s not my best forte- Calculations. But nope, not going to give up without a try. I would save a copy of those files and look at them during the holidays. To learn things that I am not good at, so that I am nearer to the finance undergraduate that I can be proud of…so wish me luck!