The night had been nice. I guess it would only be Zen who could stop me from talking about problems-that-I-have-no-solutions-for though he generally listens to them for a while too. But I guess no matter what topics I have to share, somehow some things are jus mentioned. He laughed at me, saying that how could I happily and smilingly say that 'Life has no hope', or slowly chew that green cherry though I dont like that taste.

But I guess my life is still a mess? At least my life now is abnormal. We even discussed about a-friendship-that-I-expressed-worthwhile-to-treasure, something that I hadnt thought about for quite some time. But I guess the prideful me will never admit I miss that bit of the friendship in this sense. I even thought I might skip subsequent gatherings partly because of this. Lets see how things go anyway.