I didnt need to make a bet to win, because I am right. And not on hindsight, that is. I told WL that it got to be Monday. I didnt need to make a bet to win, because I didnt want to win.

I hid away because I dont know how to face you. But I know even if I am at some remote corners of Earth, if you want to, you know the way to get me. So when you couldnt find me online, somehow this is when the mobile phone is working.

I picked up. Whether I would have done the same if given a choice all over again is no longer important. Somehow its something I have to face eventually.

Today there is another reason. Maybe deep down I dont know if to believe and trust you. I supposed I did but I asked myself if it was important. The crux is rather, for whatever reasons, things have evolved in this manner and the cycle never ends such that it always works only in one direction, things were decided by only one force. And I no longer want all this.

In my last entry, I talked about how I must have changed, but Zen said change isnt a bad thing. I supposed I understand this, jus that I needed to gather so much courage to do all these. I dont want to cry.

And, before I could finish sorting through this in the middle of work, I didnt imagine I would be meeting you in such a manner. I cant even imagine I was hearing what I heard.