Were there times when deep down you knew you make a decision but you remained indecisive?Were there times when you needed some hints to the future for problems you thought were unsolve-able? At times like this, I turned to the forces of nature. Maybe it sounds ridiculous to you, but at least it pretends to solve the toughest questions. For me, I turned on the radio and whatever song that is playing has some hidden answers for me.

The one time that it shocked me was the period when I was deciding which faculty to choose for my university studies. Its a tie between School of Business and Arts. Everyone had some opinions for me, or what they deem best for me. I listened but remained confused. I was listening to my receiver while I walked to the Interchange. Suddenly I made attention to the lyrics of the song. It sings something like - You know what is best for you; You know what it is. I couldnt say that song has made the decision for me, but I reckoned it gave me some powerful faith that I am brave enough to make that decision. And of course I went into School of Business and have never looked back. The thing is, I never quite remember who sang the song or what is the title of the song. I never hear it again too.

So when I was feeling bottled up yesterday, I opt for afternoon shopping and took on the same way to receive some hints for the days ahead. I breathed in, switched on the receiver while trying to play time by untangling the earphones. When I finally plug them into my ears, it was playing a Hua Jian's song. A super duper happy song about how the obstacles are actually paving ways to a happy relationship, how he wants to spend all his time with her, how knowing each other is a blessing while waiting is tough, how having her makes everything bearable, how it is a slow pace towards happiness, and how all of these will deserve blessings. Despite following the TV drama rather closely, which this song was the opening song for the drama, I always thought it has a chessy lyrics with a chessy music. So when this was t-h-e song, I thought not only the problem, even this hint seems to be a joke to me. I do want to believe in this hopeful hint but it paints an unrealistically wondering picture. It gives me hope and the same time equal amount of disappointment.

If there is one thing I want to tell you today
The prideful me still cant say it.

I am waiting for the kitchen to be free (mum's cooking something) so to continue with Red Ruby making part II. I hope it (all) will work out well.

I should stop playing that chessy song.