12:12 into Wednesday morning. I looked around and my room is dark. The fan is switched off while the only focus of attraction, is of course my computer screen. Still lit up. Not writing a story but going through my report write- up for the alliance. I wondered this is the number nth project that is about alliance. Ok n=3, from Nissan-Renault to PCCW-HKT and now SGC-Bursa Msia. Like i said, dont mistake this as a complaint. It is merely my fragmented, passing thoughts. Thoughts that still managed to surface as I read through word by word, line by line of the 12page single spacing write- up. I hadnt really been complaining about the workload this semester. Neither had I been pressing my calculator desperating trying to predict and foreseen my Semester grades and CAP. I wonder have i lost my stamina, my drive and my passion. I remembered that i once said that nothing is lost but everything is gone if you lose hope, if you lose the passion, the drive, the love for whatever you are doing. I wondered, seriously, if i have lost these things in life? I still wake up and go to school, I still try to pay attention in class, do my best at projects' discussion, write my best for those write- ups, prepare my best for the tests, still come back home after classes, but i wonder, if the me you see each day, the me you read about, the me you listen to, is nothing but a shell. An empty one that has forget whatever goals or aims or love but just passing each waking day to each other waking day. I guess i have to stop myself here, otherwise i (and you) will see more of the pessimism in myself.

The me whom you see each day, you read about each day, listen to each day, am I a shell? Am i still me? If the mirror reflects more than how i appear to...